Do i really know what to tell u all with this short view that I finally can login to my Site again with my new Laptop, yea my old one broke and it did took a time to come back with a new one and with time to write, damn i miss the times that I just could take a seat at a bar to write. But life is coming back and is changing again to hold us down.

I just Did my weekend in Maastricht and Sippenaeken and it was a good time to come alone and view my old hometown and surroundings, make a good hug with my brother and other families i made here before i went to Berlin. And now i am just sitting in Aachen to Fix my passwords and setup a piece I wrote back in the train wen I came to here and started off this weekend. it is a quick not in what happend to feel life back again and also a time I see that I need to travel alone more.

19 nov 21,

How Manny times do I start over with pieces I write to post, how do o do with time I am spending and were do I head to with my feelings. I am laughing with myself here sitting after a party in the train. It is a train I took often in 2019 on the same time to go home, but now I am taking this train to go back to visit my old home and meet my friends for a weekend and come back to join my Monday morning in Berlin. 

Hey lovely people it is Féj and I am doing my thing in a good way to survive a kind of weird virus in the world. Damn I said it so will it be the last time ?

Seeing how I am doing and even thinking about my last year how I felt and did my life, their came up allot of question in me to see a different world ahead off me. Were do I stand and especially were do I want to go to. Do I want move ? Move like change for myself in life or do I feel safe in myself just to be here and enjoy the things that are just in my bubble. Damn that bubble here in Berlin, it is dangerous to see how it keeps you just in Berlin, I have everything here, or not ? Its that feeling to be just here, why should I leave, damn it feels so close tho just that, I need to travel more, I need to be more alone while traveling, and I need to leave my places to do this for my good inner feeling. Why because it feels I am doing something out of my standard and it feels just better and more living a life that’s interesting for me. Hmm feels nice this to talk about, it feels that I am grabbing back to times I did the same just two years ago, it feels I want to go back to that time again, it feels that I am living more my own life. So let’s do this more and let’s go to south Africa.

So yea there is a possibility I am leaving for a time to South Africa to join a different kind of weather and vibe with one of my friends called Nico. Me and Nico and to say Leo with it because we had a damn good time visiting rave parties in the beginning of this year. It was a time were every weekend was a whole part from doing nothing else than dance and chill on different locations in and around Berlin. We did spend a time we will never forget how holding toilet paper and going for a world in yea wtf cares to dive into feelings together and separate from each other to find us or me swimming in an cold water from the lake near the bunker we did had our party in to the next day driving more than one hundred kilometres out off Berlin to create an rave that kept up for more than 30 hours. We spend times in forest were nobody else was as of a group of two hundred people dancing in a bunker the whole night and day long to chill in the sun in the afternoon to go home again with an awesome feeling together that we made it. It is a way that I met Nico and Leo because of Timo, one of my friends that has a natural energy vibe with passion of music and life of love. Yes friends for now and maybe for life in how we spend time together and so also time to spend in south Africa. Hey Nico see you in and around January and lets do some kitesurfing together there in that beautiful sea 😉

We just crossed Hamm with the train and it is getting lighter again, I can see out of the windows the contours of the landscape and lights burning in a grey dawn of wetness. I feel coming alive with that three hour sleep in a train chair yes that feeling u know u didn’t sleep but you are somehow awake and feeling like writing. Yes I am doing it and I am looking forward to get a cup of coffee, so lets pick up my stuff for a sec to get one 🙂

So saying to get a coffee I dod came back with a Erdinger white-beer, it is just something to celebrate my day off or it doesn’t matter we can do it just because we want, but that coffee will come wen I am arriving in Sippenaeken.I am looking forward in this time I am coming back alone to be out of Berlin and to manage some things I need to be in person to handle, it feels good how it is going and I am happy with my life I am doing. Maybe more writing like this is a goal to come back in like I did two years ago, was it because I lived not in a world were I could escape every moment of the day on doing things alone or with friends so easy as in Berlin. And now I am somewhere in my story that I cannot really tell what I want to say or put on paper, it feels like I said a piece off doing and that’s it. Do I want to type more or do I close my Mac and enjoy the houses, nature and industries passing by wen I look outside. 

What a time I am spending with listening to music and enjoying the vibes in Berlin of clubs and friends that are becoming closer than ever to enjoy life, it is beautiful how I look back at this times already in what we did last year, something in this is that I am looking forward to the seventh if December to celebrate a birthday of Erica. Damn I feel sometimes to trustful in her company of knowing each other in life and trips we did in life together spending time. The last parties we did together with friends in October and November are the times wen we are chilling after dancing that I want to see them also in KitKat Club, damn  it is always so nice to do that there chilling near the pool and having an live band with easy jazz and that while you are in a wild kinky fettish club were sex is the normal thing u do everywhere. Damn it is am place I love so much that I cannot spend more in Berghain. 

Do I set a story to tell u all how I feel with the clubs here, I think I let it pass and enjoy my beer and view, lets post this one. I like the journey a bit better than my last one I wrote.

See you all and thanks for all the support I see back from you. Love ya, Bisou.